cooking up a weekend dream:

So it's Halloween today and this evening will be an interesting one. will be going to a friend's halloween treats party tonight at runaway bay with Natasha, Georgie, Jaala and possibly/hopefully Georgia. i was considering going as a vampire, but im not sure.

saturday should be nice and Natasha and i will be meeting up with Lucinda to do some formal occasion shopping. then later in that afternoon will be dropping N off at school for some much needed work to be done.
and then that evening i should hopefully be catching up with my long lost boyfriend / if not; then coffee with G and her friend Lauren.

what a recipe that awaits me!

a darkened sorrow

i am feeling so alone lately, but when looking from the out side in i may look like i have more than enough people around me to have me feeling suffocated with love. but somehow i still feel the cobwebs of insecurity are wrapping themselves around my neck and heart. i cannot breath through my own lungs anymore.

im felling terrbile guilt for one inparticular person right now as i don't think i can give them everything they deserve. as good as they are to me i just cannot seem to control my current moods at the time and seem to spill the poison into their complexions a little too much.

i feel like i could almost pull off the character "Nikki" from the film "Alfie." she's unreliable both in reality and her mental mind state. alcohol doesn't help, and she seems to swing from high to low moods whenever she feels without controling them - usually for others sake. but then in the end she feels sorry for herself and knows an appology can't help much after the damage has been left behind her.

maybe i'm not Nikki. maybe the only person who can pull off her character is Sienna Miller. maybe the only character i can pull off is myself. and only with myself can i over come my inperfections. or whatever

put a mask over my face! over my life!

so on this cold evening i am leaning foward to soltitude in my life. just wishing i was elsewhere.. living my life in a distant place full of different people or atleast familiar ones i admire. as much as i know i cannot have this, or atleast not right now, i am still able to pull myself back to reality, hold back the tears, and reminiss back to why i am here. trying to keep the mask off and away.
my complexion now feels different lately. maybe i've been wearing a mask? or have been missing one? what ever is it it's putting a rough toll on my mindful self-esteem, which i don't like that much.
if only i had a few pennys in my pocket and a bag full of real-life-dreams; i would be set to roam this earth. free to roam anywhere, anyplace i want, ever dreamt of.
but then again, dreams are dreams. half the time when you have then they are just silly mirages in a cloud sticking to the surfaces of our skulls.
fuck i hate dreams.

so bord with mine, too intersted in others

this week has gone by so quickly yet so closely at the same time.
luckily it is only a 4 day working week. otherwise i would be dreadfully bord out of my brains.

not much ahead of me this weekend. most of my friends are going to byron together, so i suppose i will just hang out with myself. but then again, i am my own bestfriend at times.

muffin and i will go shoe shopping on on sunday which will probably be the only money gift highlight of the weekend. might go out with toby to an 18th on saturday night, but i wont be out for long then..

happy weekend to me!

suppose ill just post a few erin wasson photos; might make me feel a little better:

"her eye-lash was an island"

hello to the Solomon islands! my parents have been saying to our newly added family member, Tobias. as much as i am excited about going on a family holiday and my boyfriend coming with me, i am more excited due to the fact of basking under the wide-eyed sun with it's rays kissing the surface of my skin. just to think about the white sands and the clear waters (even though living on the gold coast of Australia does give me this already) makes me appreciate it even more.
a series of photographs prompted me to discuss this topic:











simply cannot wait for this endeavor to the sandy beaches of the pacific ocean, iced with the tips of the aqua green waves, tall exotic rain forest trees, wide smiling natives, and cannot forget the fresh fruit filled cocktails.
if only it were a dream. and it's not so i feel great.

an old and new obsession

from remembering my "O.C" past i remenised about how my favourite character after marissa was always kaitlyn. willa holland holds some of the most captivating looks i have ever looked upon. her style and aura just seems to jump out and into your mind.
falling in love with her daily attire both in frocks and looks i must carry on publishing some examples:



















honestly beleive she has it all going for her. and cannot wait to see her in the second season of gossip girl. or is it the third? whatever is it she will take it by storm and show us some real galmour.

hello darling

this evening i am very realxed and feel one with myself and the others around me. well maybe not everyone but atleast with the ones i care most about.

missing a few people, but distance makes the heart grow fonder. so in the long run i'll be smiling no matter what.

it's lucinda's birthday on saturday, i'm so excited for her. i think we all are. bought her the best gift today.

so this evening i think i might just settle down with a cup of herbal tea, watch a bit of the mighty boosh with fallon, and then probably fall asleep to lucinda's ridiculous jokes.

what a night!

100 posts, 10000000000 thoughts

plans have been changed for the weekend. am now having saturday night free. hopefully going to catch up with toby and maybe as a treat, rasha too. which would be nice.

sunday also consists of plans as i may be going to millies or a new friends gathering at cooly (including sunshine coast crew). so good to see old friends again.

today was a good day, fallon came back! we had a nice day of catching up. hopefully we will be going to the Get away plan at brisbane in a couple of weeks together. which would be great. havent done something hangs with fallon one on one in ages.

there are other dramas in my head going on. oh well. good night!

pucker up for the weekend ahead!

Much is being planned for the weekend infront of me. lucinda's 18th on the friday. family dinner friday evening. saturday shopping with mum. saturday nigth ashleigh's "barbie and action man" 18th birthday. sunday millie's 17th pool party. and then monday, will be a day of rest :)
so amped for what's ahead of me i just cannot hold it back.
toby was right, i am having a good week.

the big 'R'

After hours on the web today the only thing i couldn't stop researching was Ashley and Mary-Kate Olsen's new fashion line, "The ROW."

i actually think it is very much like Alexander Wang but obviously they both have their own signiture on each garment. but generally, both are very simular. and considering i adore Wang and his amazing creations, this is a bonus for me in my interests.

lately i've been alright with my wardrobe and what consists in it, but i feel i couldn't go without any of these frocks. as spoilt or greedy as i feel, i cannot resist:

Even watching the two stunning sisters walk their standard tees and jeans in the street is already high fashion reality.

so much for a day at work.

bad habits in a weekend ahead; so tasteful

For the weekend i have lying right infront of me i have a few plans. excting ones at that. not too busy yet not too boring.
friday evening/tonight going to a friend Eadie's birthday dinner. it's going to be at the amazing Chiang Mai Thai resturant that i dearly love. about 14 of us are going and will be squeezing up close and personal. Toby might be dropping me off, he's so great.

saturday i will be on the run for some formal even shoes! now that i have my dress by the talented Camilla and Marc i only have a few more steps to go to complete the formal outfit.
saturday evening will be consisting of the company with Toby and his visiting friends from Melbourne. very excited to meet them as a part of his soul is left behind there, and i count on meeting and searching every single part of it.

sunday will most likely be chil, with a bit of a skate (hopefully with noomi) and some snuggles in the evening. then back to school... the dark abys of nothingness to me.



one of the highlights of today was finding out the soundwave festival lineup! am so excited due to most of the bands being the soundtrack of my 15year old past life! consisting of bands such as:
red jumpsuit aparatus
from first to last
hellogoodbye
finch
say anything
saves the day
minus the days
silverstein
the subways
AND MANY MORE!

the thought of this makes me even more excited that i have a possiblity of going. all i have to do is make 110$ in two weeks in order to get my hands on a ticket. and since i just bought a Big Day Out ticket i dont know how likely my chances are of getting another festival ticket.... but i must go on.



here's to a great weekend!
goodbye all.

the clock isn't ticking...

whilst sitting in this god-forsaken class room full of ignorant pedestrians of education i feel like time has broken off our relationship, and loves to move its pointing stick around its clock-wise surface very slowly.
not much things in life are very fun anymore. only the weekends are the littlest bit remotely fun. wishing i had my ipod this week is driving me further than crazy and into boredom.
not really much to say at this moment, just looking foward to the weekend and the formal occasion dress i will most likely be buying this afternoon. oh, and i got my big day out ticket this morning!
hopefully i will have a very nice day today.

alex Alex ALEX!

after looking throughout Alexander Wangs web page and all of his current collections i came to the decision that all i want/all i need is what he creates. only.
the end.

making out with my OBSESSIONS...

Getting really excited at the moment as 2009 Big Day Out tickets are being sold Thursday morning at 9am. i was originally offered a job there which meant an all axess pass to see all the bands and feed them! but that little lucky dip has gone out the window and i am now paying for my own ticket. so Toby will be going to sunflower recods at 3AM this morning to line up for the tickets to be sold! such a tropper. so now i will be going to this wonderful event with my boyfriend. which is great as we're pretty much into all the same likeable music and what not. so it will be an event to remember. as much as Splendour in the Grass 2008 was totally insane, i'm hoping 2009 will be even bigger with more of my close friends along side me.

there are 28 bands playing at the event:

neil young

arctic monkeys

the living end

the prodigy

sneaky sound system

my morning jacket

pendelum

bullet for my valentine

tv on the radio

simian mobile disco

tiki taane

the ting tings

cut copy

cog

youth group

the grates

birds of tokyo

tzu

eddy current

headless chickens

elemeno p

luger boa

the black seeds

cobra khan

nesian mystic

the datsuns

ladi 6

the naked and famous

As excited as i am, i am even more excitd to the fact of the people i will be sharing the moments with. throughout the endevour ahead of us i will be holding the hand of the greatest boy in my life at the moment.

great music, great boy. who could ask for more?

a new wish list for a new term ahead.

as this new term approaches i have decided on a new list of wishes i adore and crave to have in my grasp. even having a picture of them in my mind is quite lovely, but having them all together would be a dream coming alive.

firstly starting with shoes:

I've been so interested in the "tomboy" "sloppy joe" look lately. as my boyfriend's got that hippy skateboarder lifestlye i've found to tone my style down a bit by wearing baggy t-shirts or singlets with lost of rings and long metal chain necklaces, black thick or thin tights underneath. some chunky heels are also a plus. comming across a few of these istems made my mind wind wet: Erin Wasson is a perfect example:

Then there's the designer collections:

All of these designers are great and make me feel as if i already have their creations in my grasp. the frocks of my dreams.
let's hope this term goes by very fast, and i enjoy what i already have.