I Feel:

so alone.

B is for BLOUDY and BARBIE

this halloween im going as dead barbie.

my sister and i just did a make-up trial.

none of the dead stuff yet; just basic barbie.

o m g 

at the end of the day i hope to look something like this:

you have such beautiful sparkling Lies

little stories from the weekend could not be described into any 1000 word essay.

so nonetheless than Kevin Cole was able to spit out enough metaphors for my liking;

Once upon a time there was a cigerrete named Joey,
Joey was an Italian Vogue
You could suck him down fast and smooth and enjoy every second of sexy nicotiene if you wanted to.
However Joey was released from his prison cell and into the tight pockets of the one and only Lydia Price.
Joey loved the slow sexy walk of Ms. Price along the streets which seemed to smell a lot like Mary-jane, alcohol, tattoos and the fresh leather of Doc Martins.
He seemed to be in a constant state of nausea but ecstacy at the same time.
This one Sunday night he adventured all the way from Burleigh to Surfers Paradise twice in one day!
Oh, what an adventure!
Meeting so many sexy people with cool written all over their cool and casual attitudes,
smoking Jays, Droppin' E's and knocking down Jager Bombs like it was nothing.
All in their leather jackets and wayfarer sunglasses.
It was that night that spelt the end of poor Joeys life.
While out the front of what smelt like the leather, maryjane and sex it was the highlight and end of what was to be Joeys short White and Orange life.
Ms Prices experienced fingers slipped into her slim pockets and reached for the box.
Pulled Joey out of the box, asked her tatto'd and bearded friends for a light
Joeys life ended under the spell of dirty beats, red lipstick, leather, alcohol and sex,
and he wouldn't want it any other way, knowing he spent his life reassuring and pleasuring his one true love, Cisco the disco ruiner.
FIN.

coming home . . .

my weekend as of late was absolutely amazing;

i love nothing more than making new friends and just letting my heart drain onto their faces smothering them in my love.

i just adore it!

met some lovely lovely people in paddington through Rubys (also another new found friend). 

the whole weekend plan was really all about jumping the gates of parklife... which didnt actually end up happening but still had an absolute ball! 

i think i had more fun than i would've even if i did get into parklife.

so ner nerr nerrrrr...

i fell inlove with a boy. a gay boy but still a boy nevertheless!

he is amazing and we froth on eachother way too hard.

so many amazing images:

 the night pictures start from end to beginning.

have not been so out of reality in my life, but i can remember everything and all the amazing people i was with. 

cannot wait for more memories with them.

i love my friends! 

sod off

pick up your fucking head 

true bliss

i have found my saviour,
my light,
my smile,
my reason for keeping my feet on the ground and almost wanting to nail them there for good.
they've kept me real, kept me sober, kept me drunk on their essence.
no longer will i curl up into an apostrophe,
i have been found;
no love was lost.

losing hope, sinking fast

tonight i realised my demons are much closer to me than i thought.

they've caught me off guard... and i cannot remember how to fight them.

no memory, no power, no control.

what will become of me now.
appointments need to be made.

darkness has returned home.

dont lose your trust; you've lost your trust

make me this happy again.

i wish i could be the photograph

lina scheynius is amazing.

i melt.

ready

i am so ready for you and everything you have to offer me.

because i have an arms full of bliss just ready to paint all over your body.

let's give eachother a chance.

29 and feelin' fine!

as of late my weekends sinful activities have left me feeling dull and horrid about myself

so i've come up with a solution of being super healthy during the wake to make up for my healthy.

i generally am a considerably healthy person, but just eating well really makes you feel well!

and so that is my compromisation....

but i was a little naughty last night with my meds... secrets secrets.

but no way in the world could i regret my weekend of late.

mitchy's birthday of woodstock 69 was absolutely fucking fabulous.

here's a few images of the evening:

and what an evening that was.

way too many halusinatives...

but somehow i feel i am becoming more and more connected with myself and what the world around me means to me.

its a great high.

however, its killing my soflty.

so is this all really worth it?